P.D.A

P.D.A's. Public Displays of Affection. The Tube is the place to spot them it would seem. This 'affection' can be displayed in a number of ways, and like most people, some of these ways make me want to throw up my breakfast. For me, full on tongue sarnies on the Central line are not cool, ever. Watching a couple swap saliva opposite me on the Underground is awful; finding somewhere to avert your eyes suddenly becomes a necessary skill for travel or a weird curiosity might take hold and your eyes can't help but flicker over at exactly the wrong time..is he...oh my God he is...his tongue is in her ear! 


A late train home on a Friday or Saturday night has even more x-rated sights on display. Bolstered by a few cocktails, inhibitions are lowered, people are bolder and less bothered about an audience. You may see a hand disappear under a mac and people begin to believe that lap dancing is acceptable.

But on the other hand. Sometimes I will glance up from my Metro to see a couple sharing a secret smile across the carriage and you can tell that no matter how pressed up they are into somebody else's armpit, they really can't see anybody else. Recently I saw a young tourist couple standing in the crush of commuters and the guy gently brushed his girlfriend's hair from her eyes and kissed her cheek. It was a genuinely tender moment that made me smile instead of feel sick.

The cutest moments though are when I see old couples together on the Tube and the old man will be a gentleman and ensure his wife gets a seat and she will smile at him gratefully. Makes me believe in love. Even on London Underground.